bye BYE Birthday Funk. :)

Soo every year I kinda get this funk....i don't tell people it's my birthday. I don't plan things. I don't like to make the decisions...for once. I curl up in a little poor me shell...I have these expectations that EVERYone should Know it's my birthday. Everyone should make effort to call without me saying anything. Everyone should plan a party in my honor and there should be a cake and balloons. Every year. How SAD is that? I never realized how ridiculous it was until my birthday. In the car. Before work as I was sobbing soo hard that I was gasping for air after talking to my mom. I could tell you all the decisions I had to make for my day (or should I say the day before my day, I have never worked a birthday in my life - this was very weird ) I could tell you what cake I didn't get or the balloons that weren't wrapped on my chair. The card I wanted from the only person I really care about. THAT much. Don't you hear the TINY violin playing? Ah. My husband has been sooo overwhelmed. SO busy. So tired. He hasn't had a break until...well almost now but not quite. Since October. And WHO am I to expect this on just a day in the year when he gives it to me every single day? As if it should be any BEtter than the rest, saying basically - you have to love me MORE than you do every day THIS day. Because. It's all about me. The day after we celebrated (a trip around Lanai for 8hrs. - snorkeling and sight seeing...didn't see a dolphin! :( ..and then a glorious nap - then dinner and dessert at I'O - a 200 dollar bill for free...from work. ummmm those things sound pretty fan-fricken tastic don't they?) was my actually birthday. We slept in soo late that there was only time for work. I dropped Chris off and then called my Mom on the way. I had already been bumming...not getting any surprises and such...she was talking to me - she had been sending me loving emails all morning, and everything she said was right. I just wanted her to hold me. I wanted her to rock me in her arms like she does and just stroke my hair as I cry. But I was strong, I didn't reply to her much...I didn't want her to know I was struggling on my birthday...cause then she would ask whats wrong...and then I would loose it. She warmed my heart and we said see ya later. I hung up and hyperventilation cried (hah I don't know how to write that...hah) Then it hit me. Ya know all those things i said earlier - about why should i expect all this from a man who loves me all the time, loves on me, works his ass off for me and us and did PLENTY for me yesterday? Also I was reminded of Job. He lost EVERYTHING. He lost EVERYTHING and PRAISED God. He REJOICED in the Lord after having NOTHING. I have EVERYTHING and MORE!!!! and I am here, having a pity party FOR my sELF. So sooo dumb. So I had 15 minutes to gather my breathing and try to clear off my running mascara. Then went to work. Guess what ....ALL my family called me. Mom. Dad. Peter. Caleb. Michael - and I got to actually talk  to all of them. I was soo grateful for that. And Molly, Kierstin and Grandpa Murphy Called. Everyone I think I would expect to call :) Facebook is great guys....but come on! i love the voices :) My co-worker gave me a HUGE hug and kiss on the cheek and she gave me two things of local bath salt!! When I got off work - Chris said he wouldn't be out till 12am so I went to my Dearest Friend Iletas house just to hang. She gave me a slice of apple pie with a candle in it that I made a wish on and blew out! She gave me a Mug and 4 kinds of Tea :) Then I went to get Chris, came home to find a gift from Mom and Dad in- law..a Cupcake ornament! and then the next day from Mom and Dad a cute lil pirate keychain!! and spending money from both parents so i can get crafty things and things I want to purchase from here before leaving. Chris and I went to bed and then that was that.
Sooo....did I tell you what my honey got me? only the best thing I love the most. The ocean. 8 hours on the ocean. 8 hrs including snorkeling in the CLEAREST water i've ever been in, a circle around Lanai (a hawaiian island.) seeing shipwreck beach, seeing two baby whales and one mama and just loving the wind on my face...boats are bliss to me. Thanks to my work...I have collected gift cards to one of their NICE restaurants. Soo yummy. My favorite was the Artichoke Pesto with Focaccia Bread. It was very lovely. It was a nice day. We checked one of the last things off our Maui Bucket List. Ok. SO. Next year. I'm not working on my Birthday. I'm planning a party. If I don't get a cake - it will be part of the party planning! I might tell my mom to just fly to see me instead of her sending birthday cash. I am holding up my chin as a grateful, oh so blessed and humble child of the Lord Jesus. I will not let Satan instill ungratefulness and greed and expectations into my heart. I will DOMINATE this childlike thing I like to do on the 6th of January. Enjoy the photos!! (sad there are none of I'O...)

My Birthday Pie from Ileta!! 

for mom :) ....Mug and tea - Ileta, Bath Salt - Sofia co-worker, Cupcake - In-laws, Pirate Elizabeth - Mom and Dad :)