Head in the clouds...

sooo much on my mind lately....soo many decisions for Chris and I to make...So many. And we have little amount of time to do so. How to know what is the right decision? Well, that i guess we just have to give up to God in good ole faith and trust. Ugh....drinking my coffee and contemplating these things...My best friend just had a baby too, and I think being NOT there is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do in my life. I have been very emotional lately (poor Chris) just wanting to be there to give her ice, get the dad to be coffee or whatever errands they might need, and being a photographer...there is the desire to capture this milestone in their life. This milestone also being my milestone in a branch off sort of way. Being an Auntie and all. Ah man...This ocean you guys, it's HARD. There is a lot of heart ache that goes on...a lot of tears, a lot of hopes and wishes...no regrets..but just feeling very helpless and or left out. Basically I got hit in the face with the this is life pie. Everyone grows up - everyone keeps having milestones...I just have to embrace my life..live in the moment and treasure it and be happy for everyone, rather than sad for myself  that I am not there to share in their joys. Ahh although the Ocean may be a burden in those ways...I am SOO grateful for all it has forced me to learn!! And it feels soo dang good!! :) hmm well it's crazy to think that the next thing in our life would be to settle in a place on the mainland, with our things - and begin a family. Soo many thoughts about the future..especially going through my BFF's joy of starting a family! Ahh, I have desperately desired a baby since basically our I Dos...and we are here to be selfish before starting a family. So yeah..this adventure is coming to an end and the thoughts are "Wow, are we ready?" and every question you could ask...hah. hmm what else! Oh!! Have you watched "The Last Song?" I played piano from the 4th grade to the 11th. From the 11th on to my 22nd birthday It was always there for me when I needed it! It has been 1.3/4 years since I have had the ability to release on my piano, plunk, play...what have you. I read "THe Last Song" By Nicolas Sparks before I watched the movie and just totally Bawled my eyes out!! A lot of it had to do with the events in the book...but a lot of it had to do with the passion of the piano. I have been desperate for it. So I called my Dad and asked him if I was allowed to take it whenever I want (as far as what kind of place we get...) and he said "Of Course!!" ahhhh Dad!!! Isn't he great! Another thing that has burdened my heart...every co-worker of mine is going through something horrible. Abuse. More Abuse. Death in the family. Death of a pet. ugh...it's yucky. I feel sooo grateful for everything I have. I am soo blessed. Well I had to get it out...cause my hubbs can't take anymore, by BFF has a newborn and my Mom is moving into a new home soon! Thank goodness for God, who is my constant, and then this blog! hah.